So, you know that boy in college who’s slightly older, slightly trouble, and slightly incredibly cute?
Yeah, that’s Sunny.
I lived in a house during college with some older girls; they took me under their wing when I quasi-broke up with my quasi-freshman year boyfriend during sophomore year and they invited me to meals, drinking, shopping. They ran with this pretty big group of friends; they were all a year older than me, and all semi-hipsters. There was a few young men in their group of friends, but no one really worth pursuing. Except Sunny. Sunny was the boy who, at the end of the night, would always put his arm around me and say, “Don’t worry, a good guy will come around.” Or, “You’re too good for that idiot.” I know he didn’t see me in any way except perhaps in a younger sister light, but he was adorable, and there was something about his smile and the way he looked at me which totally made the fifteen year old in me melt. I mentioned my crush to the older-girls and they promptly told me to stay away from him because he’s into drugs, etc. So, I sort of put him out of my mind. I ended up with Adama, and I resolved Sunny to be a friend, and only a friend, in my mind.
Flash forward to Friday night. My four guy friends from college have a band. They were playing at this dive bar in The City so J and I went to go see them play. It didn’t dawn on me until that day that perhaps Sunny would be there with some of my older friends. So, we show up and it’s like a college reunion; there was a bunch of people from school, and so I mingled and talked and laughed a lot. It was really awesome to see everyone, and I didn’t even really notice very much at all (maybe a little, tiny bit) when Sunny walked through the door. He looked quite hipster in his plaid shirt, skinny jeans and long necklace with a Star of David at the end. He has this quick and raspy, whispering, type of voice; he came over and gave me a kiss hello, “Heyyyy Miss March.” My stomach did a flip, but I smiled sweetly and nodded my head at him in my usual coy manner. So, the night when on and Sunny and some of the older girls were outside having a smoke. I went out to make a phone call and ended up talking to Sunny. “You know,” I told him, probably having some wine-bravado on my back, “I had a crush on you all through college.” He looked at me, eyes wide, “Nooooo….” he responded, smiling, and shook his head. “Yeah,” I quipped back, “You’re adorable, who wouldn’t have a thing for you?” He smiled and said thank you and I skipped on back downstairs to the bar.
Well, wouldn’t you know it. Not twenty minutes later I’m standing there, by the bar with some friends (the music was really, really loud and the bar was really, really small, just so you know) when Sunny walks over to me, stands right in front of me and this conversation occurs:
Miss March: What? (I put my hand to my ear to show I had no clue what he was saying)
(Now, at this point I was pretty sure he was asking me to come do drugs in the bathroom, so I’m glad I double checked his question before I shook my head no).
Miss March: What?! Come what in the bathroom?
Sunny: KISS ME.
Oh, got it.
I smiled at him and we danced to the back of the bar where he kissed me. My college crush, the bad-boy, the adorably handsome boy that I watched from afar as a silly sophomore was now holding my face and kissing me in a bar. Weird.
He stepped back, looked at me, and said “Wow,” I raised my eyebrows at him, “You’re a really good kisser.” “Uh, thanks?” I smiled. “I don’t know, I thought you’d like be more…different?” I think he meant younger, but he didn’t want to say it. I smiled again and he kissed me again. It was really funny; inside I was giggling and laughing, but on the outside I was playing it cool. This was a total NSA kiss and I really dug that. We ended up moving bars and I ended up hanging out with my amazing guy friends from college; but, in the shuffle, Sunny found me again and gave me another kiss. It was so silly, the whole thing. I couldn’t help but laughing. Kissing Sunny was everything I thought it would be, sure; the whole thing was almost verging on nonchalant. It was like it was something bound to happen in my life, to get it over with, so I don’t always wonder (ala Jake Ryan). I’m glad I had the opportunity to see what it was like, he was fun to see and kiss; but, I’m older than I was when I had a serious crush on him, so part of me took the whole thing in stride and I felt like I was watching a movie of my life. You know, like I was in the audience, holding popcorn, watching myself kiss this boy I once crushed, in the bar, with music blasting, glasses clinking, and friends all around. And, I have to say, the movie wasn’t half bad.
You ever have moments where you feel like you’re in the audience watching a movie of your own life?