Miss March’s Keychain

For some reason, the last three days, the lyrics to Castle on a Cloud from Les Miserables has been etched into my brain. It’s an extremely sad song about a little, neglected girl dreaming about her fantasy castle where she will be safe and happy. It got me thinking about fantasy places. We all have “places” that we go when we are sad, scared, or need to disconnect from reality for a bit. Often times, these fantasy places that we go to have fantasy guests that join us there; they could be real people in our lives that we miss, or care about, or they could be people we know we’re most likely never going to meet, but in our heads, they can dine with us at our fantasy hotel.

I have a lot of fantasy places that I go to when I’m upset. There’s one I go to with J (the inn that we want to buy someday); with A, in my head, I often to go a USO dance in 1944 where we pick up sailors and dance ’til dawn (I never said I was sane); with T, I often go to California and imagine us driving through the hills of Northern Cali and meeting interesting people at small coffee shops. These fantasies connect me with the people I miss and love; they’re usually fantasies of events that I know we would enjoy (or, in A’s case, would have enjoyed) together.

My fake motel key, keychain from Admiral Adama.

The other day I got locked out of my house, temporarily, and while struggling with my keys, I stopped and took a second to look at my keychain. My bright red keychain is a fake motel key; the Admiral bought it for me when we were shopping together in DC one weekend. We thought that they were adorable because they were like “old-fashioned” motel key chains (opposed to the new cards you slide in the door); he bought us each one. Now, we both have them on our keys; I know it’s silly, but to look at that keychain, it reminds me of all the amazing times we had together in our little fantasies and dreams. Although we still talk a lot, and he’s so important to me, a part of “us” is now forever gone. I’m not his and he’s not mine. However, in this fake motel, in this fake little town, we’re still “us” laughing and dancing in this fake little motel room with busted curtains and dimmed lights.

Where do you go to escape in your fantasies? And who joins you?

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4 responses to “Miss March’s Keychain

  1. That’s funny because I stole a keychain just like that one time. Now it looks so cool, I wish I knew where in the world I would have saved it!

  2. sometimes i’ll fantasize about me walking into a party or on the dancefloor or something, looking fabulous. or performing on stage at a concert. hehe. something that makes me feel like i’m worth a million.

  3. i usually fantasize about looking fabulous as well. sometimes, i place myself in an episode of gossip girl, with you and steph as my main gals haha.

    by the way, the sailor thing is so sex and the city, and i would be totally down for that. haha

  4. i actually fool myself into believing people think im a celebrity when i walk down the street, i mean… people do yell hello at me from cars so maybe its working? my happy place is my future house with kids scampering and lots of pottery barn-esque furniture, but not pot. barn, original stuff. also, running an inn too– what’re the chances?! also being in a huge suite in paris, london, rome. or a beautiful bungalow in east hampton, greece or the coast of france.

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