Today I got stopped three times, twice in school, and once on the street, for compliments on my new shoes. I was thrilled to tell people that I got them at Target and they were $10. It made me feel really good to get complimented on something as little as my shoes (and they are little!). It got me thinking about complimenting people; I love giving compliments. I try to give as many as I can during the day, especially to my puberty-stricken students. Erin, from Glamour’s Single-ish said recently,
“I believe every red-blooded American woman needs to hear at least one compliment a day. It can come from anyone—and it can be about anything. As long as it sounds genuine.”
I think that’s true about everyone, not just women. I feel like I constantly tell BB and The Boys that they look great, or their shirt is cute, or they look in shape, or that they’re handsome. I like making them smile, and I especially like boosting their confidence levels. I feel like, however, I give out many more compliments to men that I receive. I think men put too much stock into saying “you look great” or “you’re beautiful.” For women to say it, we don’t usually turn it into a heavy situation, we’re simply just telling the men that he looks good in those pants, or what not. But, when women receive a compliment, and men are very aware of this, sometimes we twist it into our own words and make it seem like a bigger deal than it was supposed to be. If a man tells a woman he’s seeing that she’s beautiful, she may think he means more than simply “you’re beautiful.”
There’s also a variation in the type of compliments that one can give. For example, one of the Boys calls me “bella” which means beautiful in Italian. I enjoy this. In fact, it makes my stomach jump a little. However, one of the other Boys calls me “hot” as in “wow, you’re so hot.” Is hot less romantic than bella? Intrinsically, yes. I mean, bella is not only “beautiful” but Italian, the language of love; whereas, “hot” is a little abrasive and sexual. However, they both mean the same thing: the man finds you attractive and wants you.
What compliements do you get from men? Do you think too much into compliments?