From Sunday’s New York Times Magazine, The Ethicist section,
Minutes before my first lunch date with a man I met online, he called to cancel because he was hit by a bicycle and was in the emergency room at Roosevelt Hospital. I later called the E.R. to check on him, and a nurse said he was never there. Weeks after that, I heard about another woman with whom he used the same excuse: hit by a bike; in the E.R. Is it dater beware, or is there an obligation to be honest even online? — BETH ROSE FEUERSTEIN, LONG BEACH, N.Y.
Sounds all too familiar, no?
To quote myself, about MusicTeach, from July 18th, 2008:
On Thursday I got two text messages from him. One was asking me to come talk to him online. The next said that he had gotten into a sports accident and his face was beaten up. I came online and we chatted. He thanked me for checking in with him and told me that he hadn’t even told his parents’ yet (so I was the first person he told?) and that he was “in hiding and would be for the next few days.” He didn’t make any mention of our day together, which I found odd. Later that night we talked online again. Again, he talked about his accident and told me, three more times, using different terms, that he would be unavailable for a few days because of his accident.
The accident he was referring to was a bike accident. He apparently biked right into a tree and scarred himself up horribly (think: Quasi Modo). However, when I recently saw him, although it had been some time since “the accident,” he had made it sound like he was scarred for good. Did I see any scars? Negative.
Does anyone know this Beth Rose Feurstein? I would love to find out this guy’s name! She also poses a great question, is there an obligation to be honest, even online? I say of course there is–but, apparently many people don’t have the same morals in the real world as they do on the ‘net (or maybe they do, and that’s doubly scary!)