Miss March Challenges You!

Miss March has a challenge for you!

While talking to A tonight, she said very sternly to me, “I really don’t think there are any nice guys out there; I don’t believe it.”

I chose to disagree with her.

Is finding a "nice guy" like solving a rubik's cube? Just when you think you got it, another little color block pops up and you start back at square one.

Of course there are nice, good, sweet men out there; I mean, there has to be, right? Admiral Adama was the best boyfriend and friend he could be for the 3.5 years we were dating. Yes, I had my issues with him. Yes, they were major issues, but he was a sweetheart, most of the time.

Am I just proving myself wrong here?

What exactly constitutes a “good man”? My grandma would probably say, that a good man takes care of you, puts your first, never yells or snaps, lets you live your life (did I just describe a man or a dog?). Are we asking too little of men (just the other day I said to CB, “All I want is for someone to be nice to me and call me back!”) or perhaps we’re asking too much of men (be my best friend/partner/always be on/always be nice/do the dishes)?

I have a feeling that BB is going to be a “good” and “nice man.” He was raised with two sisters and watched men break our hearts and make us cry; he must have learned something from that. He’s in-tune, I think, more than most other men are, with a woman’s manners, methods, and reasoning. He’s watched his sisters chose or not chose to continue seeing men in their lives and our reasons for that.

Okay, after reading over this post I realized I quickly changed the question from finding a “nice guy” to a “good man”…I wonder why I did that?

I guess I see them as one and the same; someone who is a “good man” is also going to be “nice.” Don’t get me wrong here either, I’m not saying I’ve never met a nice guy, but they are very, very few and far between.

And yes, it’s certainly hard to find a nice guy out there; I’ve found, in my dating travels, that many men aren’t sure of themselves yet, so they take their insecurities out on you. But, there has to be a plethora of hidden nice guys out there, right? Maybe they’re all on some island, preparing me Apple Juice and vodkas with Tasti D Lite for dinner…

…or you could just start humming the tune to Matchmaker, “But, he’s a nice man, a good catch, true?”

Here’s your challenge: TELL US about any NICE GUYS you know! (and are they single and in the NY area? I kid, I kid. Sort of…) Prove Miss March and A wrong!

Are there any truly Nice Guys out there?

Miss March Movie Spoiler

I watched Definitely, Maybe last night and I have to say, I really enjoyed it. Not only did the movie star some of my favorite actors (Rachel Weisz, Isla Fisher, Kevin Kline) but the concept of the movie was quite unique. Yes, the movie was about love; finding love, falling in love, falling out of love. But, the movie was also about the bigger picture of life; for example, if you didn’t date this one person, you wouldn’t have met their friend who finally introduced you to the love of your life. It’s about that fact that there’s a reason for the people who come into your life and it’s not necessarily for them to be your one true love. People come into your life for reasons unknown to you until you look back at your life in retrospect.

Also, the woman he ends up with in the movie is not the power-house woman, or his college sweetheart, but a friend. They’ve only ever kissed. They talked, on and off again, but in the end, it was her who stole his heart. However, he would never have found her again if it wasn’t for his daughter…and his daughter would never have been born if it wasn’t for his college sweetheart and he never would have run into his college love again if not for her friend, and it keeps cycling around.

It just got me thinking about my theory that everyone comes into your life for a reason; I really do believe this. You don’t know why you meet the people you do, but perhaps there is a master plan that we are unaware of.

In other news, Coheed and I texted some more today. Like I said before, I don’t think I take him seriously enough. I’m sort of quickly becoming the Lucy to his Charlie Brown and I find myself getting very snarky with him. I think it’s cause a) I’m not really sure how I’m feeling towards him. I know I like him a lot; I know I even adore him as someone important in my life, but I’m getting a lot of new feelings toward him and they’re new and well, not scary as much as exciting, and makes me a little nervous. And b) It’s sort of hard with him far away and we’re both not really phone people, so we text and IM; I guess I can get overly sarcastic and I don’t mean it. It’s sort of a confusing situation for me. We didn’t talk for so long and then WHAM we’re back where we were when we were 17 and 18, but now we’re 23…we’re adults, we’ve grown, we’ve had real relationships. Yet, I still feel young when I talk to him. I think I need to see him again to figure it all out. Luckily, he’s probably coming around for his birthday. However, on the flip side, I don’t want to get myself too attached because he does live far away and I don’t know when I’ll see him. Miss March is confused, but happy.

I emailed a guy on Match.com. He’s very handsome, and totally my type. Match.com allowed me to see that he viewed me, and I had “winked” at him, but he didn’t respond. So, I emailed him and told him that I thought he had a fantastic smile.  I do have a paid account for Match; it’s because my mom was using it and transferred it to me when she got bored with it. Otherwise, I never in my life would pay for an account.

Everyday I’m feeling a little bit better about meeting people.

Did anyone see Patti Novak on Oprah the other day? I love Patti Novak because she tells it like it is; it’s the same reason I love Suze Orman. They get straight to the point, no BS. It’s the stuff that’s too hard for friends to say to us, but we need to hear. I sort of want to go to Patti Novak and see what she says about my dating style. I think she would say I open up too quickly and reveal too much of what I want (to have a steady relationship and kids in the next few years). Perhaps I do reveal that, but only when asked–which surprisingly, men ask! I just read through Patti’s dating tips and Mr. Medboy didn’t follow any of them (such as, don’t talk for more than 5 minutes before the date–we talked for an hour; don’t be late–he was 10 minutes late; early evenings are the best time for a date–we met at 10pm) . Patti would say, “don’t go out with him again!” Luckily, I agree.  What do you think Patti would say about your dating style?